I just need tight wranglers and a cowboy hat…
Have you ever seen the movie the Emperors New Groove? During the movie, Kuzco is turned into a lama and Pacha helps him find the magic potion to turn him back into the Emperor. As they are trying different potions, Yzma (who turned Kuzco into the lama) swallows a potion that turns her into a cat. While she’s talking, she stops and says, “is that my voice?” in a very high pitched tone three times. On Saturday that same quote came to mind as I was giving the best man toast at my brothers wedding. I started the toast and I could hear my voice over the speakers and it sounded like a very twangy southern accent. I thought the DJ was playing a joke on me and hit a special button that made my voice sound like a good ol’ country boy. I paused a few times to make sure it was me. Sure enough I picked up some accent from somewhere. Maybe it was nerves or maybe it was from being in the orchard for 8 days harvesting almonds. Whatever it was, I spent the rest of the night convincing people that I don’t have a twangy southern accent.
that hurt!
Have you ever pissed off a hive of bees? I should have known that throwing water and prodding the hive with a stick would piss them off. We are pulling a roof off a house and under the shingles was a hive. They have been pestering the workers all week and we finally found the hot spot. We all took turns trying to remove the hive to another location and when it was my turn they had enough of us picking on them. I have had my share of stings, but this one hurt the most. The bee did a fly by and stung me on the side of the nose. There was no landing, just a stinger in a very sensitive area. I swiped at it and hit myself in the nose again. Seconds later, my eyes teared up and throbbing began. It felt like someone had hit me in the face with a baseball bat. I now have a bruise on the side of my nose from the sting. I think from now on, I will walk away from the bees.
Jinxed
When it comes to fixing bikes, Dug may not be a handyman. On the other hand, I like fixing things and luckily I haven’t had to do much to my bike. In the last year I have pumped up the tires, occasionally lubed the chain and I’m good to go. But reading his post made me think of all the things I could do to make my bike roll smoother. So I tore my bike apart and the thought crossed my mind, “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!” I ignored those thoughts and continued to take apart and clean my bike. The bike was ready for a long ride the next day.
Feeling confident with my clean bike, I headed up Clarks Trail. Within a few pedal strokes, one of the most aggravating things happened- the chain slipped off and my knee slammed the stem. Just as I was about to turn into the Incredible Hulk, I tried to pedal out of it without realizing the bike broke down and I crashed into a tree. I fixed the problem and caught up to the group. It happened two more times within minutes of the each other and at this point I was done riding for the day. I tucked in my tail and cut the ride short. From now on I will carry the tools and hope that someone in the group can fix my bike. I should have known that I would jinx myself by thinking I had mechanical prowess.
Road Bike
Its been a bad year for my road bike. Its been hanging like this for months now…
I don’t think Beatrice will ever forgive me for neglecting her this long. Maybe I will surprise her with a ride up American Fork Canyon on July 24th.
Tour Of California
I grew up in Merced, Ca and the Tour of California made a stop there this week. Jaynann and I put it on our list of things to do while we were home being family. We convinced my brother and his fiance to join LanceMania with us and they were kind enough to drive us around so we could see the riders. I was not sure how many people would show up to a cycling event in Merced, but I was pleasantly surprised at the turnout. Seems like all 70,000 residents came out to cheer on Lance Armstrong. Lance was the last racer to sign in and he stayed a few moments at the desk and spoke to the crowd. He has a good thing going with the Lance Armstrong Foundation. I highly recommend checking out all the good things they are doing to fight cancer. Jaynann and I wore our Pink Fatty Jerseys and brought along a Sharpie just in case Lance was signing jerseys.
Here are a few pics from the race. We were just a few feet from the racers during the race. I was amazed at the speed these guys were at on flat roads. There was a huge dust cloud following the pack as they cruised through town.
Jaynann got a great shot of Lance Armstrong…
Cool Jerseys
Is anyone looking for a cool jersey? My brother in law Rick is designing and selling some pretty sweet biking gear. I got my first one back in November for Fall Moab and it has become my favorite. Here I am sporting the new look:
Check out his site and pick up a couple before they are gone. I can’t wait to see the t-shirts and socks they will putting out soon too.
a BLOG about NOTHING 